Hey parents of teens – pastor Mike here. I’ve been in your shoes recently (they are good shoes, but demanding).
God has appointed you the primary shepherd of your teen’s heart, even today. You are the only parent(s) they have. Psychologists consistently combat the primary lie at this phase of parenting – that your job is done and their peers are now the primary reference point. NO. Studies show conclusively they peg who they ARE and ARE NOT becoming primarily to you, all the way through age 21. So don’t check out, mail it in, or retire prematurely from taking leadership in their life. However, it does look different the older they get.
I have a suggestion for you: make a deal with your teen(s) that they give LFC’s RE:MIX youth group a try for ONE MONTH on Sunday evenings, starting tonight.
I have three reasons: 1. loving adult mentors will thus be in your kids life, who love Jesus and love them - WHAT A MASSIVE ASSET. It made all the difference in the world in my two sons lives. 2. they'll hear the Bible taught to their life-stage skillfully. 3. they will know they BELONG to a caring, fun group of people who love them and identify as followers of Jesus Christ.
I get it – when our children hit their teen years, ‘making’ them do something is still possible, yet often counter-productive. That’s why I recommend making a deal, offering an incentive. Here’s how it sounded for me as a dad of high schoolers:
“Hey bud, spiritual growth and following Jesus is important in our family, and as long as you live in our home, you’re asked to share that priority, primarily by attending church worship with us. But the best way for you to grow spiritually is to be part of our church’s youth group RE:MIX on Sunday evenings. I’d like to make a deal – you attend RE:MIX for the first 4-6 weeks of the fall (starting this Sunday night). And I will hook you up with XYZ (what is something they like? Dinner out at a nice restaurant? Movie tickets? Pay for a pizza party with friends at your house? Make it valuable to them IF you value their spiritual health). After those weeks, we will have a conversation and decide together if RE:MIX is something you’ll participate in the rest of the semester.”
The fall kickoff is this Sunday. Check the website like a modern human for times and details.
Oh and by the way, we have crazy renewed energy in our RE:MIX youth ministry this year. This is the result of stable years’ long leadership under Mike Hall, Cammie Howard, and their dedicated team of leaders. They are fun, they’re intentional, they care about each teenager and their spiritual life.
The results of Lake Forest Church-Huntersville’s RE:MIX ministry thriving is not just that more teens are showing up for ‘events,’ but its weekly discipleship, seeing tons of teens serving throughout every ministry of our church and on mission trips, and a bunch of kids whose families don’t even attend LFC wanting to belong at RE:MIX.
